Tag Archives: funny

Letters From Children

For today’s weekly humorous post, I thought I’d share with you some of the letters I’ve read that have been sent to ministers all over the country.  I always find it interesting how the mind of a child works.

Dear Preacher, Please say in your sermon that Peter Peterson has been a good boy all week. I am Peter Peterson. Sincerely, Pete. Age 9, Phoenix

Dear Preacher, I’m sorry I can’t leave more money in the plate, but my father didn’t give me a raise in my allowance. Could you have a sermon about a raise in my allowance? Love, Patty. Age 10, New Haven

Dear Preacher, I think a lot more people would come to your church if you moved it to Disneyland. Loreen. Age 9. Tacoma

Dear Preacher, I liked your sermon on Sunday. Especially when it was finished. Ralph, Age 11, Akron

Dear Preacher, How does God know the good people from the bad people? Do you tell Him or does He read about it in the newspapers? Sincerely, Marie. Age 9, Lewiston

Dear Preacher, I would like to go to heaven someday because I know my brother won’t be there. Stephen. Age 8, Chicago

Dear Preacher, I know God loves everybody but He never met my sister. Yours sincerely, Arnold. Age 8, Nashville


You knew it had to happen eventually . . .

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Chia Keyboard

Bulletin Humor

Here are some funny bloopers that have appeared in church bulletins (not ours, though!)

“Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.”

“The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been cancelled due to a conflict.”

“For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.”

“Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.”

“Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.”

“Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7PM. Please use the back door.”

“Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.”

“Please welcome our new minister, Don, a caring individual who loves hurting people.”

“Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy lunch.”

“Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.”


Witty Wednesday

Hmmm, which one do you think is less??

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